“ Bhed chaal of the Tolerant India”

“ Bhed chaal of the Tolerant India”

Woke up with n no of funny messages on my what’s up about the recent statement Actor Amir khan gave for India being an intolerant country. Poor Amir got hacked by all "proud Indians" across the nation. Fact is many of them enter into this category all of sudden very seriosly only to enjoy such debates. Though personally I also feel his statement was a little irresponsible one on a national tv even when many of us also know that he must have not meant it so seriously to hate India (he cant afford to).

If you are a celebrity or some known personality , never feels too much of proud. Indian public can praise you to the extent , you feel like you a not less than god and if they start hating you suddenly you can be the most dreadful devil for them for your smallest of your error (human error or whatever –doesn’t matter)

Scrolling down the messages, tired irritated, when checked FB obviously most horrific platform for such things it was in worst condition. 

Finally I logged on to Twitter, the new  brainy way of putting your thoughts forward which was initially known to be  occupied by opinions of intellectual public and celebrities only but here I go to find the same story doing rounds  (obviously in a little decent way ) as if there is nothing more left in the country to worry about.

Crazy Indians even the most  intellectual ones follows this rat race of liking , commenting , debating on one particular issue sooooo very much , it becomes endless. I feel like screaming Stop the bullshit you nonsense people , get back to work!!(by the way  I am also included in those crazy Indians community many a times LOL..)

Twitter being considered the most intellectual platform these days by many. Yes it’s the fact. There are many who comment , like, retweet such as if they are amongst the most brainiest, serious and sensible Indians whose one line opinion on twitter will bring some change on the national  situation. Few spending longer minutes to draft-craft a single intelligent line to be posted as “tweet of the day”

Opps ! No offence to the ones who really do :-) Yeah I know many near ones in the above category.

There are more than half who had not even seen the telecast of the show where Amir did this blunder and are liking, commenting and debating about the topic just because everyone else is . What shocks me is - many groups who were against Amir starts favoring him after 2 days because now the topic is turned? From supporting #AamirkhanDeshChhodo to suddenly liking #SupportAmirKhan

What a drastic heart change?  This we call “Bhed chaal” (Following the crowd) in our Desi Indian language.

Just sharing one of the hilarious post:  “Guess the Movie and Suppport Amir khan “LOL….

Intolerant India??? Really Amir? You see Each and Every nonsense is tolerated here.

Stay Blessed – Jaya Pathak

The Drum Experience

  The Drum Experience 

A humid early Sunday  evening of August, I was in a school campus, chairs arranged in 2 huge circles. There were only few people like me came there to explore what going to happen and rest were I guess the organizers which I could make out from their black uniform T-shirt they were wearing and what attracted me most were the 50-60 colorful drums arranged orderly in the middle of those chairs.

Yes I came here with one of my friend on her persuasion to attend some event called

The Drum Circle.Totally unaware of what’s going to happen? Is it a musical event? The Drums were right in front of us but we didn’t know how to even hold it properly forget playing . Then for what were we called? Many questions, casual discussion doing rounds among st the strangers present there .Finally we were told to take our seats (Chairs) arranged like 2 huge circles and choose a drum out of the ones placed in  middle. Finally a guy who introduced himself as “Rujul Vora” welcomed us. One can easily make out that he was a person who loved music, somehow I quickly sensed his passion the way he started interaction with all of us. An easy going, free spirited, passionate music lover is what I would shortly describe him as.

What followed next is impossible for me to jot down, just want to mention that those 2 hours what he made us do, was one of the best experiences I ever had in my life. It seemed nothing special.  But When we all started drumming in different rhythms and styles, facing strangers, exchanging smiles, giggles, happy expressions and It all went on for 1 and a half  hour and there came a point where we all were intensely playing the drums and I found a different ME ,felt the trance , not worried about how I  am playing what I am playing who all are around me, I just loved what I was doing . I just felt free with no boundaries and trust me the feeling was amazing. Out f the world!

"When you cant feel anything else, you can always feel the beats"

After the session we were divided into group of strange people. I knew none of them. We introduced each other and were supposed to meet again on a decided day and time. I simply thought it to be  simple way of socializing but what made me wonder was that we were not suppose to exchange numbers and meet again only on the basis of the trust of words that “I will be there” like in olden times . Now this was something new for everyone in this fast pace what's up and FB world. You don’t have options to change your plan as once you leave you will not be in touch? So whatever had to be decided, hasd to be decided right then and suppose to be followed to actually know who is a genuine person.

I loved the idea and took it sportingly. It was playing in my mind as there could be no alteration in the plans as I had no contact of people I had met. I pre-poned my doctors visit that day and reached at decided spot on the said timings.

There were 6 of them happily smiling back at me when I joined them. We shared our lives, dreams, experiences with each other and within half hours time I felt as if I have known them all since years.

We all continued our stories till 2 and half hours and all felt content and happy while departing with a promise to meet again. I said to myself. Life does have set of genuine people one must never loose hope.

I found myself extremely happy, cheerful and confident meeting these new set of people and adding them as friends in my life. Music brought us all together.

The Drum Circle indeed gave me a superb experience of life time and I was sure after experiencing all that, I would  not be able to hold myself back to jot it down in my next blog.:-)

Don’t Miss to join drum circle facilitated by Rujul Vora, if its there in your city or near by your area. For more info:

Click and Join: https://www.facebook.com/thedrumcircle

          P. S: Thanks Janki Patel for taking me there.

         Thanks Rujul Vora for such a beautiful initiative. There is nothing more beautiful in  this world then  to feel that your efforts made a difference in someone’s life. 

         Good Job !

 When Words Fail , MUSIC Speaks

CheersJ - Jaya :-)

The Stare

The  Stare

The day is Saturday. Got ready for office walking down in my society towards office. Wearing the most casual and comfortable clothing, a pair of denim and a cool decent T- Shirt. Our Society residential blocks are constructed in one straight row so the main gate of society is easily visible to the residents of even the last block. And I happen to stay in the last one.

 Instead of driving activa today I was walking down -crossing my society to catch on of the rickshaw piling around my society daily. I was all pepped up in Saturday mood … humming and making my way towards the main gate. I don’t know when but I sensed a man , rather a gentleman types man (my by default first impression)  in his early 30's standing quiet a feet away with a another man looking at me.

At first I took it very casually and ignored and concentrated on walking and saying hi hello to the society people whomsoever crossing by my side. But as I was coming closer to the man I felt he was specifically looking at me only .I looked back at him to confirm and I was right. My blood rushed up and down a little faster. Still being positive I thought may be he knows me?? Is he misunderstanding me with someone else? 

Walking even closer, His gaze grew stronger , I made a straight eye contact back with him to embarrass him but to my shock this man's stare grew even intense and now was not confined to my face, the pair of eyes were screening my entire body as if I am wearing something weird. I quickly mentally checked myself if I was dressed inappropriately (How fool we females are to find faults in ourselves first, that kahin galti se maine to kuch galat nai na pehna?)

As I was coming closer I felt embarrassed  inside but bravely continued my eye contact with him (my BP levels going higher with each passing seconds).The moment I crossed him, I couldn’t hold my self back and with the spirit of being a 21^st century brave women (who must not allow any male to degrade her) asked him in a strict voice  “Kya ghoor raho ho Bhaiya? Kuch problem hai kya?”

Morning time had few people including the society watchmen, old age ladies; teens around me all caught my attention and were curious about my sudden outburst. The man to my surprise turned extremely soft , decent , camouflaged himself and replied “aree madam kya ho gaya aapko? Main kahan ghoor raha hu, main toh yuhin dekh raha tha.Sorry aapko bura laga ho toh.. and looking at others  to gain sympathy further he murmured “ salla normaly dekh bhi nai sakte .. aaj ki ladkiya kisi bhi baat  ka batangad bana deti hai aur ek awaaj par bechare  ladko ki band baj jati hai ”

Even though He and I both knew what his intentions were. I was hurt and angered both at the same time on his hypocrisy manipulative behavior and shrewdness but didn’t want to create scene which already caught attention of people around me. No one uttered a single word in my favor instead giving me a look as if it’s all my over reaction and gender biased blaming. I even over heard an aunty saying “aaj kal ki ladkiyo ka dimaag hee satve asmaan pe rehta hai"  I went totally blank and quickly caught an auto and moved towards my office.

Who are these people who say that with awareness the times have changed. Things are better for Women now because of Women empowerment and blah blah… 

There are loads of People who feel that females are not in as worst position as they portray all the time these days and this women empowerment  thing has ruined their mind..India Tops in Hypocrisy is not at all a over rated statement . 

Does "something wrong" with a female only means a Rape … a physical assault?

How can you catch and blame people who put you into deep embarrassment even without touching you. IS there any rule or law or punishment for that mental Assault? 

A dirty, lustful stare to a female is something still to be considered normal and better than what used to happen earlier??

Notice. Think. Understand.

Happy Women Empowerment to all the ladies out there.:-)

Stay Blessed! Jaya

The Great Indian Wedding

The Great Indian Wedding

A rare day after long when I have nothing really important to do. Just feeling bliss full after those busy days at work and home. The wedding times, the event at office the official training, all left me tired and exhausted but yes definitely with more knowledge,  experience, emotions and a step closer to be a better person and you know that’s the best part.

So many different experience and different set of people, environment and culture.  

At one point of time I was in my home town in this heat to attend a close cousins wedding where I met loads of Agony aunts whose basic motto to attend the wedding is to know who is doing what and where and why? "beta you have changed a lot," "Itni se thi jab tujhe dekha tha!" are the common phrases we hear when we go to home town after long (Arnt there obvious answers to these questions.... aree itne saalo baad mili hu toh badi ho he jaungeena...lol..) but probably when i grow old i might also respond in the same way under such situations, you never know ..oops!   but I just reverted back to all of them with smile (of course a fake one) just to give them a feeling I am not rude. (But I was not really interested to answer all the questions making them restless about me!! Huh! ) 

Heavily Dressed up ladies were worried about their hair and running make up due to the heat of month may and constantly cribbing “log garmiyo mein kyun shaadi karte hai, ache se tyaar bhi nai ho sakte” lol.

Elder groups behaving most formally and overly respectfully with each other because they are either from groom or brides side…and its curtesy to show respect.  It’s a another story that this day is the last day of receiving maximum respect. 

My poor groom cousin was patiently (just looked , he was not internally ) sitting on the stage waiting for his bride to accompany him at the earliest …to get rid of  the marriage rituals and photography sessions in this scorching heat  but he dare not express the above feeling from hi s face.. How can he? He was the Jamai raja after all and is suppose to smile the whole night today whatever he may feel deep inside..lol..

Not only my cousin after a while  I started pitying  the couple (including the new bride dressed up  in the heaviest red dress and accessories )  on the stage silently following our Indian wedding norms  by standing up every time someone comes to greet them on that huge stage and smiling mandatory to have a good click .. And the most irritating part was few annoying kids from both side of the family torturing the couple from every corner coming, clinging to them, giggling and posing for n no. of photographs.Huffs!

most fun part was to see the just new daughter- in -law and mother- in- law being so closely bonded emotionally and showering the maximum love and care for the first and the last time… what happens later is a story known to every Indian MIL and DIL...HaHaHa …Irony! Isn’t?

Yes the best part was when I felt happy to meet some old childhood faces … grown up as dads, mums and ready to discuss and gossip about the mysteries of each others life.he he, it was nice :-) I was also surprised and laughed inside to notice few people who just came to pounce on only and only food and then vanish, I am sure they must not be even remembering the faces of the bride and groom who were the main sufferers of the big day.

Here ended The Great Indian Wedding J  there is much more my eyes observed but not everything can be captured here. In short  it was fun to revive the ironies of Indian wedding in my mind while I was travelling back and decided to share some glimpse in my next blog. 

If you happen to attend any wedding post reading this… enjoy, I am sure you will have more fun now In spite of this heat :-)

Thanks for reading J

Stay Blessed! Jaya

“

Never sent Drafts...

Never sent  Drafts ( June 2002)

Hi Dear!

             Just had a word with you, though not for so long as you were having flight to catch.... as i told you i tried stopping myself not to call you or talk to you, but then i thought grudges are not to be kept for long, you never know it is the last time you are talking to the person ?

anyways,   i was going through your sweet binani  cement  diary where  once you had poured your heart out to me , it just touches me when i think it was a beautiful, relationship, which started as a  bit affection,  then friendship,  then  converted into a deep love relationship.(at least for me, not sure about you)

Ask you one thing? can u really forget the moments we had together, the talks we had, the kind of things we said to each other, the manner we perceived each other, the courage we gathered for all those stuff, the  unsaid feelings n emotions which we hardly used to express to each other because of so much of social barriers, the joy n satisfaction we used to derive from each others company, the tension we both went thru,n most important the natural intimacy that we shared...n so many things...... ???(Answer me honestly if possible for you)

The way i used to trust you blindly for everything, yes everything, your advice, your words, your touch, as if you owe me!! And a sudden shock to me when one day i find, that the same person has left me forever..I wish if u could feel the pain i went through. Now was it just an infatuation of mine towards you for sometime?? i wanted to find out . then i found out  the great part that i still somewhere after so much of denial, confess the fact that  even today i m just unable to hate you.. Would you call it infatuation? Does an infatuation continue for 3 long years? And when I could easily get anybody in my life if i wanted? Answer these questions if u can...

Let me repeat your words that..."its not wrong to love somebody, even if the situation isnt in your favour, but in every case you should be aware of your correct way as well. Even if we love we cannot afford to forget our other responsibilities. Commitments, n we need eachothers moral support, like a true friend who love each other purely n truely.Can you lend me your loving hand and show me my path to success n happiness? my love for you will always remain same for you wherever i go, whatever i do.jst be my good friend, n put faith in me, let me do something for you n make this world a  better place to live for both of us , even being far away. lets make our love more meaningful nn enjoyable .lets give our relationship a name- "success" rather to define it, to regret, or to blame it. Lets respect the love we share, Let our love be a secret for our good.. Trust me.. just trust me.. its for our good..” do you agree on your own words?? i do! Then why are you not with me.. u promised we will never be separated mentally at least..???Then come on.. Show up..

Don’t know how you will take all this? I hope I receive answers to all my questions someday. It will happen only when I send this to you.

And trying my level best to click on send button so that it reaches you finally yes even after 3 years…. I know it wont change you.. And yes I know you are doing this for our good but still. i will still wait...wait endlessly for your revert....don't want anything from you except few answers for my questions, explanation for do I really deserve gifting me this mental loneliness forever?? Lots to talk, u know...hope i get that one day with you with no social and mental barriers…. I know its difficult still I shall remain alive in that hope .

Love ...

“Some people are going to leave, but that's not the end of your story. That's just the end of their part in your story.” 

And this piece never left the draft folder and those entire questions till date remains unanswered.

We all must be having many such old drafts/thoughts  in our mails or minds or heart which never got poured out…but still these thoughts whenever we go through them years after years comfort us , leaves us feeling nostalgic…Life cant offer us presence of some people around us all the time but he makes sure you come across something randomly which connects you with them with the most genuine emotions during those seconds.. So true!:-)

Drafts …. Unsent Drafts…..

"First unexpressed feeling are the most natural and sacred"

Stay Blessed:-) J

Being Married -Sight of your partner:-)

Let there be n no. of stories, theories, philosophies on relationship between couples, the way it is portrayed, the most advocated diminishing spark between 2 people, agreed and experienced by almost every couple. The granted attitude , the ignorance, the lack of caring, sensitivity the endless nagging, the no “Chemistry thought” , the screams, the loose temper, the big big ego clash, and finally the craving of being Single all through our lives and much more it’s the endless list. (Sounds familiar isn’t? lol)  

Agreed, yes there are many which are truer than true but above all I strongly believe however mad you become at your partner and take harsh decisions of not talking and keeping quiet and getting frustrated then you need to analyze it calmly someday that can you stop nagging at things forever? Can your stop caring? Can you stop missing him/her; can you be strong enough to live alone? , Can you imagine your frustrations remaining only to you and not ever shared? Can you imagine living life without any restrictions, no reminders and no instructions? No imperfections? Can you imagine even one year without a fight between both of you? the list goes is endless. It seems easy and light but trust me it will not be and rather it will be frustrating for you after a while. That spark is needed in any way but its mandatory it keep both of you busy craving and burning for each other.

For years we stay together, live together, share together, learn together, fall together, and cry together, the effect we have on each other. A part of him will always be in you, and a part of yours will always be in him.We become each others habit.

Analyze your relationship and you will discover that this is the most beautiful and fulfilling relationship in the world above all.

Having a life partner is the most blissful feeling. So the crux is however imperfect you both are or vice versa or the whole world including you mock about this relationship at the end of the day if you feel that “There is nothing quite as inexplicably comforting as the sight of your life partner” and if it is so (it is so in my case) trust me you are in a perfect relationship. Value it, cherish it and treasure it for late years of your life.

Beautiful Song ...

I wanna grow old with you  I wanna die lying in your arms  I wanna be looking in your eyes  I wanna be there for you  sharing everything you do I wanna grow old with you  I wanna die lying in your arms....

 So just go back home and feel proud to have someone to back upon, look at him / her with genuine love and say them thanks for being there with you all through your life.

After all "Marriage is what all you have been through with somebody and make that as a memory

worth cherishing"

Stay Blessed- Love -J